I ask myself these questions many times. Right now its many times a day!
Why did I do this to myself? Am I actually crazy? What? Why? When did I ever think, this would easy?
Ok, maybe I never thought it would be easy. But I most certainly never anticipated this!
I am going grey. I have crow’s feet. I am stressed. I am underfed. I suffer from sleep deprivation. Lastly, and possibly the worst of all, I am prone to spontaneous unnecessary outbursts of madness.
I am a mother of five. The leader of a pack of seven.
My children fight tooth and claw. It’s like pack survival. The leader and the subordinates. They battle for the top spot. And my do they battle!
#1. The wannabe teen.
He can’t do anything that’s just not cool. He no longer understands the concept of chores. Takes great pleasure in annoying the rest of the family. The ability to hold his tongue has left him. He makes it his life’s ambition to cause me the highest stress level possible. Then casually asks if he can have £10 to go out with his girlfriend!
#2. The quiet instigator.
Now, I should admit, he isn’t currently that bad. He sits quietly and can be happy if left alone. He still hates chores and complains grossly if I ask him to do anything. He can start an argument by just looking at someone. But he doesn’t cause too much trouble. It’s a case of leave him to it. But if you waken the lion he will fight. And he can most definitely fight.
#3. I want to be like my big brother.
The junior version of #1. He talks back. He protests continually. He thinks it’s cool to be smart with me. But he’s just not quite clicked on when to stop yet. He’s got the attitude of #1 but not yet the intelligence to know how far to push me. A rough mix.
#4. Drama king.
The little boy version of the little girl drama queen. The world is always coming to an end. Life can’t go on if he can’t do whatever it is. His legs will drop off if I make him come though and tidy up his breakfast dishes. He is always hard done to and will act like a mouse when really, he is a dragon.
#5. I’m your last baby and you know it.
He uses his big brown eyes against the world. He is very cute and has mastered the puppy dog eyes 100%. He is now 3 but seems to have forgotten to leave the terrible 2’s behind. If I just push it enough Mum will pick me up for a quiet life. I’m spoilt because I’m the last one and everyone wants to cuddle me.
That’s my life. Challenging isn’t it!
These tiny humans have made me cry and drink wine. To enjoy trips to the supermarket alone. To creep around the house when I get up early, desperately trying not to waken anyone before I get my first cup of tea. To scream manically on a school morning. Then without guilt, feel a weight being lifted as I wave them off into school. It feels like a constant battle.
Is this every mother’s life or am I just a crazy one? I’m not sure I want to know!